Losing Mr. W

It felt so unbelievably real – and my whole world crashed.
I could sense the meaningless of my life and would risk anything to save him.

I dreamt that I had to dive 100metres straight to this other world – and even felt like as if I had a case of decompression!
And the wierd creatures we were studying started to go frantic.

I even remember killing this human-fish-like monster with a blade, and it only sliced his arm.
And putting black boards around the tanks to prevent the other creatures from going crazy.

When I knew my area was cleared, I had to go over to baby’s.
And I just felt that he could be in serious danger coz of the lack of people there. Plus there were crazier monsters there.

I started getting worried about him diving – coz he don’t dive.
and then I thought he might not survive the frenzy!

That was when I woke up. (Woken up by Jean actually)
And I tried to sleep back to continue my dream to know whether he was alive or dead, the story just wouldn’t come back!

I felt what it was like to lose him. The feeling is indescribable.
I just felt so lost.

Waking up to reality, I know, for sure (not that I don’t already know), that Mr. W really really really means a great deal to me.
I love you Mr. W!

It has been one week of attachment and initially it was okay until some irritating people in the company lar.

Anyhows, I think this is my first post after my hair cut. And thankfully Mr.W still loves me and doesn’t thinks it look awful – though my self esteem has dropped and probably I don’t care much about how I look already or something. hmpf.

Really. Thankfully Mr. W doesn’t think it’s awful or that long hair still suits me or something. And he actually kinda like it!

I hate it sometimes coz of the curls but then again. My hair isn’t as flat as before, so it’s okay to me sometimes. It’s a love hate relationship with my hair.

Plus, I don’t use as much shampoo now and I won’t have food stuck in my hair, and I won’t kiap my hair on wierd places now and then. Yes, I’m that clumpsy. But when I tie it up, it looks like hamster tail lar! hmpf.

I’d better sleep. 7.30am tomorrow! sigh.

Mr. W Part III

This silly boy is finally returning home from Taiwan!
(we went Taiwan on different days with our families)

And I MISS HIM SO CRAZILY MUCH.

Okay, what’s probably keeping me sane is my dosage of twilight, hanging out with close friends, home food and 313 (shopping). HAHAHA!

I’ve been in 313 for almost 4 times already but none with him yet! I can’t wait to bring him there. He’ll be so amazed by the many levels of Zara! Weet!

And coz he call me and sms me so much, sometimes it feels like he’s just busy working, not away from Sg.

This little silly bobohead is really so so sweet. Called me at 12mn on New Year Eve and gave me a big virtual kiss! (we talked for what, 10minutes?) He said if you kiss your loved one at the time when it strikes 12, they will love you forever! (apparently he heard it from the tour guide!)

I can relate to Edward and Bella in twilight sometimes. How they both love each other so dearly, and will do anything to keep each other safe and by their side.

I love Mr. W so darn much. Like Bella, I often have voices from Mr. W especially when he’s away.

I think of how we got together, our first kiss, our journey, our funny conversations, etc!

It’s so creepy how sometimes (most of the time) Mr. W can read my mind. He knows what I’m like exactly, knows what I’m thinking, knows what I don’t want and won’t do.

Ah, that silly boy. It can be really sweet though like how he knows sometimes without me saying.

Our taste’s the same too! So we usually agree on the same clothes, dresses, shirts, etc. USUALLY. There’s still exceptions sometimes.

I MISS YOU SILLY BOY. I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU! YIPPIE.

2010

I wish that the world wouldn’t end. It’s too fast, not now please, it’s barely a year with Mr. W and I’ve not gotten enough!
Plus I haven’t gone travelling the world with Chupsy and Mr. W.

So I wish for a better Earth. Less pollution more green!
Also wish that the world leaders would do a better job than the recent Copenhagen meeting.

I also wish for happiness and health for my lovely parents and friends.

Plus, I wish that Mr. W and I will have an infinity of years together! Yayness.

(oh yes, I wish our studies and work will only get better!)

Happy 2010!

LOOK WHAT MR. W GOT ME.

I AM OVER THE MOON, LITERALLY.

Now I’ve another thing on my list to occupy me before Mr. W comes back from Taiwan!

1. I’m going to decorate my room abit and fill it with lovely pictures taken with my loved ones.

2. Play the game baby got me.

3. Play PSP (got new games. heh)

4. Sort out my notes and keep them to one side (and maybe look into some of them and see what I can study? – i won’t do that. hahah!)

5. Go Shopping with my girls

6. READ MY TWILIGHT SERIES. (i badly want to finish before attachment starts)

7. Probably DIY something. (if i got the time!)

okay. blog again. too tired! nites all

Christmas – My Favourite Time of the YEAR

Yes, Christmas has always kinda been the favourite time of the year. Coz it’s the time of the year where no matter what goes wrong, there’ll be still this warm fussy feeling in the inside. Plus, it’s the other time of the year you get presents!!! (ah, I LOVE presents)

It’s a reminder that the year’s ending, time to do some new year resolutions (that I can never keep!)

It’s also a time to be thankful. Thankful for what brought you this far, what made you, YOU, thankful for having the people who love you, thankful for everything.

And it’s a time for love ones to gather.

This is our FIRST christmas together. And I’d have to admit. I got carried away buying his presents. So right now, I’m BROKE. No more expensive food. Lets all stick to kopitiam for a while.

We spent time with his family, having gift exchange plus mahjong.

And don’t forget. It’s 12days of Christmas. So you’ve got 12 days to reflect on your whole year and be thankful for whatever came and whatever went.

I’m thankful for everything this year. Inevitable ups and downs – what don’t kill you only make you stronger.

But m I stronger?

I wish to be stronger and smarter.

I wish to be less sensitive, more confident and less paranoid.

I wish to be more determined and focused.

I wish for my family to be always healthy and happy.

I wish for Mr. W and I to live happily ever after.

I wish for Mr. W and I to survive all our academic years.

I wish for happiness and love for the people I love (you know who you are!)

Merry Christmas all.

(okay! time to sleep now. i miss you-know-who).

xoxo

Xinxin

Five Days

F I V E days to christmas. Have you got anything for your loved ones yet?

and also F I V E days to our month-sary!

I’m still searching for christmas presents. And the crazy crowd in town dampens my mood for shopping.

Despite buying almost the whole taiwan back, I still need to get some “essentials.” But my wallet ain’t allowing me to do so.

Here’s my TO-BUY list : (based on chronological order)

1. Prada wallet in Fuschia.

(picture taken from prada.com)

2. A bag-that-can-also-be-a-pouch(strap can be removed?) big enough to contain and protect my polaroid *needs to be light and portable (GOT THIS ALREADY!)

3. A bag-that-can-also-be-a-pouch big enough to contain and protect my Diana F+ lomo camera (with flash) *needs to be light and portable too

4. Pens that are able to write on polaroid films (GOT THIS TOO!)

5. Fotofall Umbra to put all my polaroids and printed pictures (hinted to Jan. wonders if she’ll get me that! HHA!)
*or actually, I’m thinking of DIY-ing my own photo area in my room. I got the perfect plan!

(picture taken from google images!)

6. Anything pretty like jewelry? I’m quite jewelry-deprived. :/

7. PC game (must be mac-compatible!)    *RAGE or *Sims 3 Expansion Pack (world adventures)

8. Xbox plus the whole band set! (think it’s quite impossible for me to get this. hmmm)

okay. i THINK this is it FOR NOW.

Taipei Day 1

This is the 5th time in Taiwan. But I don’t recall my first three times. I only remember the one that I went with Mr. W. Ah, i miss him bad. Recalling our love journey, well, we’ve really gone quite far.

Just half a year ago, it was my first time in a long time since I went Taiwan. And it’s almost like I’ve never been here before. The first three times were when I was a kid. Probably 5, 6 years old? HOW TO REMEMBER?! Dad said I had chicken pox here. And we do have relatives and stayed in their places before. BUT I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO MEMORY OF IT. I think someone erased them all (too much heroes)

Anyways, back to my long winded story, I just feel very brave to go with Mr. W alone. Also first ever time to take a plane with just 1 person alone. (not that it’s really so much of a big deal)

My whole main point is. I FEEL DAMN BRAVE CAN. Experiencing earthquake, surfing, walking and getting lost back in the middle of the night from a night market back to our hotel.

The trip with Mr. W meant a great deal to me.

It was rather spontaneous. We’ve talked about going somewhere together before exams were over. Even took some brochures from the NATAS fair, but the H1N1 scare really crashed our dreams. Feeling so disappointed and saddened by the fact that it wouldn’t be safe to go elsewhere and bring back the H1N1 virus and infect our families, we decided to forgo the idea.

I still remember that day. When the MOH announced that it’s okay to go overseas as the threat in SG and other countries are almost the same, we brought the idea back almost immediately. I remember calling him, telling him about this, and we somehow thought of the same thing!

After convincing my dad and telling him the MOH news, I knew then, I could go.

The happiness is quite unexplainable.

That was when our intensive research for hotels, air tickets, places to go, and places to eat started.

Then I broke news to some friends and they agreed that this trip would either strengthen or weaken the relationship. Well, it’s really not easy to live with someone’s habit for two weeks. And I’ve not tried that before.

And I felt a little skeptical. “What if we kept quarreling during the trip and we end up having the worst holidays of our lives”, I thought. (You know how paranoid i get sometimes.) But something struck me. If it happens, it happens. It’s all fate. And that thought never came back to me again.

The thing is I just feel so comfortable with him. All gloominess could turn to happiness with him around. I think he has some magical power or some sort. He dazzles me. (Like how Edward Cullen dazzles Isabella Swan in Twilight)

Mr. W is neat and organised. He rarely loses his things, and usually knows where he puts them. He is responsible and assuring.

Most importantly, he looks after me well. Going all means to ensure I’m safe. And assures me that I’ll be safe. Well, I’m brave, I’m good. Heh. But definitely better with him around.

The silliest thing? He stayed up ALL NIGHT when we experienced the earthquake. Just so to ensure I’m safe. THAT SILLY BOY. (and I slept like a log after the scary earthquake – that I thought was a ghostly encounter but then manages to convince myself it’s an earthquake)

Almost like I’m having someone much older than me. Like 24? HAHA. He’s 2 years older than me in the lunar calendar. I like his security. He ensures nobody touches me or pushes me around. And also ensures I get enough of my DA BAO XIAO. heh. And enough drinks too. Yes, I drink more than I eat, and he eats more than he drinks. Happy Happy.

AND HE NEVER LETS ME HOLD MY LUGGAGES. This silly boy carries almost everything for me. Even if it would weigh a ton and hurt his shoulders like crazy, he still insist. Silly silly bobohead. :X

And he likes to tease and laugh at me. Laugh at my clumsiness. Laugh at how i can bang my leg onto the table and have a huge ass bruise the next day. And after laughing, help me put zambat. Silly Silly bobohead. (I remember having 3-4 bruises all over my body and I don’t even remember how i got some of them)

YES. THIS IS HOW MUCH I MISS MR. W.

HE’S ALL IN MY HEAD NOW. HOW U TELL ME. HOW.

darn.

Anyhows, the rain spoilt my plans to go to the night market and buy tons of dabaoxiao back. However, there’s still tomorrow.I need some shopping. Else I’ll indulge myself in Twilight. Yes, I got the book to see what’s made all the fans so addicted! Read a straight 14 chapters on the plane and even made conversation with the airport girl coz of this book. HAHA!

Haven’t watched the show yet but will do when I get back n catch it with Mr. W! (he isn’t that enthu though. probably coz he don’t know what it’s about. HA!)

Okay. Will end of here.

I MISS U MR. W!

Xoxo

Xinxin

i really hate last minute work, staying up late, and school.
it makes me cranky, and unhappy.

i just want to stay home till everything is over.
i’m just so tired.

I’m going to bring my little brownie out on his first jog with me on my birthday! maybe max too. depends if he wants to jog with brownie. haha!

and perhaps make a brownie for brownie, and max and bobby of course. weeet! a low fat low sugar low everything for my pretty doggies

Mr. W Part II

Mr. W, Mr. W – if I had to summarize him in 4 words, it would be MEAN BUT VERY SWEET!
(and that’s the thing about him. people think he’s all cool & mean on the outside, but they just haven’t seen the sweet stuff he has done for me. the sweet stuff will melt you)

Often, I would have detailed visions in the future with him. Is this a sign?
And I really hope we can go Work Travel USA together! weeeet!

So what this guy and I have in common?

We both support the Italy National Team – and wants to go Italy together… (and many other places together, including Alaska! weeet!) [ p.s, he knows Italy's national song! HA! and wants to learn Italian together!]
[p.p.s I know he wants to shop some Prada there too! HAHAH!]
[p.p.p.s we can finally support something together!]

We love shopping especially in Zara [and I've never failed to choose the correct size for him YET! - heh]
We love designer stuff – but too bad, no money now, cannot buy!
We have the same musical taste! [minus his love for Prodigy(esp when he drives. guess it's his car song!- heh. i think mine's westlife. HAHA!]
We think alike
We like the same kind of food!
We wants to travel the world together
etc etc etc…

What I like about him?
I like his driving style. Aggressive, quick yet safe, very safe, never let ppl bully! [if i drive r8, who dare to bully me?! hmpf!@#!@#]
I like the security I get from him.
I like how much I can trust him in many terms.
I like how he reassures me
I like how he surprises me with little surprises
I like how he really pays attention to me when I talk.
I like how I can really really can talk to him!
I like how we can laugh really hard for one silly joke! HAHA! (mostly bout how clumsy I can be. :/)
I like how he becomes so clumsy like me too! influence I guess. HA! (sometimes he’s quite a himbo!)
I like how he can finish my sentences and tell me how I’m really feeling when I’m saying that I’m feeling some other thing.
I like how man he is

AND THE LIST GOES ON.
will cont’d when I’ve more time!

loads of loveee..

If you’ve not seen this yet, it’s finally on youtube!
v